Just blah blah blah...

I am supposed to be writing a paper, but I have written so many papers in the last few days that my brain is not functioning. So what do I do? Well I come here to do some other writing. See my blog (which I have not been very faithful with since my Broth-in-law died, sorry) is more like fun writing. While homework is, well work. But I will briefly tell you what I have written so you can see why I am procrastinating (But i will have to get back very soon since it is due tomorrow.) Anyway, I have written a twenty-six (yep 26) page Teacher Work Sample for one class, A twentyish page unit plan for that same class. I wrote a 10 page paper and a 5 page paper for another class, another unit plan (this one was about 18 pages) and 4 page paper for another class. So in two weeks that's what...somewhere in the neighborhood of 80 pages? and that is only for three of my classes! I actually didn't count the writing for my other two classes.

So here I am blabbing on to the wide Internet world, where probably nobody will read it anyway. lol

But see I do have something to say, kind of.

See I have been really struggling lately. With Blake's death and the mess surrounding that, I have been wondering if I am doing what I should be. I mean I always thought that i am supposed to finish school, and I still feel that way. However, I am feeling more and more as if there is something else that is in store for me. I am also feeling as if I what I am doing is causing pain for a few of my family. I just felt as if... Well I don't know, like I wasn't doing anything good.

Well the other day I stopped to visit my grandma, and she told me how proud she was of me. That I was doing something very hard and she admired me for it. She went on to say what an example I was for the rest of the family, not only my own, but my cousins, aunts, and uncles well. I just kind of shrugged it off, I mean so what right? grandma's are supposed to say things like that. But then...

My dad called me. Which he does every so often. And he told me he was proud of me and how it neat it is that i am finishing school. again, he's my dad so he should say stuff like that. Then...

(are you seeing a pattern?) My mom tells me that she is really proud of me but again she is supposed to say that right.

Then my Mother-in-law is talking to me and tells me how great she thinks it is. And Then one of my good friends says the same thing ad adds how she is jealous of me going back!

So I realize, maybe I am supposed to be here. I mean, I know it's hard. I know life happens. I know that I may be a horrible witch to my family when I have to write 100 or so pages in a matter of weeks, but I am doing something good! And Heavenly Father knew I needed to hear people tell me that.

So there is my blah blah blah post to remind me why I am doing what I do. Now it's back to the homework! Hopefully i won't neglect you for so long after this week when finals are over. TTFN!